Elderly Conundrum

Being a Long Term Administration Major, I am beginning to look the elderly straight in the eyes.  I am beginning to see them as they really are, and how exactly it would be working for them.  Today I had an epiphany with the way some of them work, notably my nemesis from the ARW Club at the Collegedale church.  It is interesting for me to note that I am always at the church working when they come and do their once a month meetings, some might call this a mere coincidence, but I see it as Irony.  You see there is always this older lady, and maybe you have seen these type too, that thinks the world is hers.  You have heard the old addage, God's gift to the world, well she thinks the world was God's gift to her.  So I come into the church this morning at 9:30 to witness her going into a fit.  She was making points to the general populous; well anyone who could stomach her, with such flawed logic even Ted Kennedy would laugh at.  I am going to simply break down all that the "boss" had to say.  1.  While surveying the many chairs that were left up from the sabbath school class yesterday, for the 9:75 sabbath school class she said; "It seems that the Collegedale church cares more about the youth than the elderly, since we have to move all these chairs".  Really?  There is a two point response I want to make on this one; in a pure economical, utilitarian approach, since the youth has more, talent, energy, and years of service to offer the church, than yes the church should care more about them.  Secondly, there are more elderly in the church today, in fact the church is predominately elderly, the generation that you are concerned with the church caring too much about is a small fraction of the church, and it is because of attitudes like yours that the numbers are small.  Additionally, you are locked into the church, although you need care, love and attention just like everybody else you are not going to "leave" the church at your age.  The Youth in which you look down at could leave the church at any moments notice, the facts are their that prove after college the majority of Youth stop attending church.  Now do you want to choose their side or are you going to sit on your thumbs as our church's average age gets older and older? 2.  After I had been in there for several minutes helping them stack chair after chair making headway towards fixing the problem that she so overtly didn't care about fixing she makes the statement "where is the sexton, is he not going to help us?"  Really? I come to your blessed meetings every sunday that you choose to have them, and in that time never once have I showed up late, or not helped you.  I am a hard worker, and it is because of me that you get the setting up done when you do.  Also have you ever asked other men to come set up tables and chairs since we have to do it every time?  No, you simply drag your husband (Which is a saint by the way) to every meeting so that me and him can set up everything, while you tell us what to do, and then proceed to get in our way by putting table cloths on the tables.  Table Cloths! When we haven't even put chairs around them!  Also do you ever thank me?  Actually I don't know you may most the time, but not today!  And do you even know my name?  I have told you multiple times, and in multiple ways, spoke it to you, wrote it down for you, sung a song to you, I even had it sky writed for you once, but do you know my name, and do you care?  No.

3. "We were here at 8:30 and nobody was here and the door was locked, we couldn't get in!"  Really?  You have it scheduled every time you come for the doors to be opened at 9:30 and yet every time you try to get here earlier, a lot earlier, and you are somehow surprised every time that this is the situation.  And also what do you come in that early for?  You don't start eating till 12:30, the hardest part of setting up is putting up the chairs and tables, and you don't do that!  So then why in the world do you want to get here at 8:30.  Is it because you like to feel more important than you are, and that you like holding stuff against people and non profit organizations such as the Collegedale Seventh-Day Adventist Church?  I think I struck Gold, solid Gold.  You see I have no problem with the elderly, I don't stereotype, and I don't hold grudges, I just don't want to be there anymore where this woman is scraping her nails on a chalkboard.

On a lighter note, I heard a great joke by George Akers at the ARW meeting.

You've heard about the Texan haven't ya?  His father told him that if you want to live to 100 years old, you need to sprinkle a little gun powder on your oatmeal every morning.  He did that and he lived to be 103.  Now when he died his family had him cremated.  He left 6 children 24 grand children and a hole 30 ft wide under the crematorium.